HOW TO USE THIS WEBSITE
When you click on the Family Resource Guide, you will find educational material on the topics needed to organize your personal information, which are separated into sections.
Please note that at the end of each section there is a link to the data pages that match that section, which are used to record your personal information. These data pages are also available in the Resources section. These can be downloaded and printed for your use.
Let’s talk about “Stuff”. We all have it. Whether you consider it useful, loved, valuable, or filled with memories… we have it! You kept it for a reason, but can you remember that reason? Is it applicable to your life now?
How you leave your physical estate is your choice, but now is the time to look at your home through the eyes of your heirs. Your Trustee or Executor will have the fiduciary responsibility to distribute your physical, as well as financial assets. Leaving that person armed with the information discussed in the Family Resource Guide is a gift of love, but so is downsizing and paring down the amount of STUFF that your heirs will not want.
Today, the secondary market of used items is at its lowest we have ever seen, as there is an overwhelming number of items being offered for sale, even on an international level. The younger generation typically does not want, nor do they have room for the antiques that you cherish, your collections of antique linens, tchotchkes, holiday decorations, books, etc.
I suggest that you talk separately to each of your heirs and ask what they would be interested in inheriting. Often, their first choice is the unexpected, such as a picture or figurine that they loved as a child. Once that information is collected, you can make your decisions and create your lists of their requests. As you downsize, you can ask if anyone wants what you are releasing and let them have it now. If it is requested by two or more heirs, add that to the recipients’ list, for fairness and transparency. When your list is complete, date and sign it and put it with your legal documents and give the Successor Trustee/Executor a copy.
I so often hear “My kids would never fight over our stuff”, and I cringe. OH, YES, THEY WILL!
In my 30 years of working with Trustees/Executors, I have only had ONE client family in total agreement over the distribution of the physical estate. ONE!
I would like you to consider these triage questions each time you open a cupboard, drawer, closet, file cabinet, or a box in the garage/storage unit.
1. What is this?
2. Why did I keep it?
3. When was the last time I used or looked at this?
4. Do I have more than one of these?
5. Will I ever use it again? (Especially if you have not used it in over a year).
6. Even though “I paid good money for this”, is it worth keeping if it not going to be used?
7. Can someone else enjoy it rather than have it shoved away to address “later”? (And SOMEONE will eventually have to handle that.)
8. Would a family member or friend want this?
9. Which non-profit thrift shop would be appropriate? (If it is not something that you would offer to a family member or friend, reconsider donating. These businesses are overwhelmed with items that they cannot sell due to age, condition, etc. They must pay to get rid of these items. Please respect your local non-profits.)
